Delight – the exhale after the pause

It was like any other beautifully quiet Sunday morning. And then I had one of those monumental ‘ohhhhhhhh now I get it…’ moments!

You know the ones – something you’ve been pondering for a while, not always consciously or even close to the forefront of your mind but lurking and skulking in the background. And then viola, when you’re not thinking about it, it suddenly makes complete sense. Yup. That was me as I began that Sunday.

Let me set the scene. It’s Sunday morning. This one was rainy. Cloudy. Humid. BUT I love writing on Sunday morning’s because it’s such a peaceful time in the Village. The building sites – and there are many – are shutdown; the ‘speedway’, as we locals call it, had yet come alive with muscle cars and Harleys and the pub carpark is quiet.

I’d just pulled my daily Re-ignite Your Elegant Rebel Oracle cards Pause and At Peace, a beautiful combo for this Sunday morning. My Pause card has been a constant companion this year, as it was one of my overarching 2025 theme cards, balanced with the Delight card from Denise Linn’s Soul Coaching Oracle Cards. An interesting combination and one I’ve been pondering all year. Pondering the mechanics of weaving these two seemingly opposite qualities together.

Delight from the Soul Coaching® Oracle Cards by Denise Linn, Hay House 2024

As I was gathering my ‘what will I write about today?’ thoughts, the early morning quiet was broken by the loud, questionably dulcet tones, of Johnny Cash coming from our driveway. One of my neighbours had decided to choose the early morning serenity to share his love of Johnny Cash with all of us.

And as much as I love music, Mr Cash is a wee bit too depressing for me, so I close windows etc, sit back at my desk, and as my brain begins down the overwhelm path, I catch my screen saver. Pause and Delight are staring straight at me, and let out a big ‘ohhhhhhh’. It’s taken almost 12 months, but now I get it! I decided to pause, breathe and focus on my own music playing softly. And as I did, ‘Doin’ the do…’ by Betty Boo sprung to life. How could I not get up and dance!

Dance away the overwhelm brewing. Dance myself some joy and focus. It was, dare is say, delightful! That seemingly small pause was the perfect antidote, for the external sensory overwhelm creeping in and for regaining my focus and peace. And of course it got me pondering. Without realising it, I have been intentionally stopping, breathing, pausing and finding the micro-joy moments – delight – to refocus every day.

These two cards remind me of this daily, consciously or not. And there have been some monumental moments of ‘stuckness’ and overwhelm this year. And breaking that pattern with silliness or joy has been my go-to! And now I realise why.

Turns out Delight is a remedy for overwhelm, and Pause is the doorway. Together, they create that definitive bass line, assisting me to move from stuckness into flow, from procrastination into presence, and from masking into unapologetic me-ness.

And this isn’t just something I do – turns out there is science to back up what I have been innately doing.

The Peace in the Pause

As my Pause card from the Re-ignite Your Elegant Rebel Oracle Cards announces: ‘Ditch the drama and the clever busyness and unplug, even if it’s for five minutes. You will find peace, in taking the time to pause and reset.’

Pausing is not laziness—it is unapologetically anchoring your peaceful centre. A place where we create space for reflection, self-care, and thoughtful response.

Reviews in Psychology Today and Frontiers In Psychology, show downtime activates the brain’s default mode network, which is critical for creativity, memory consolidation, and problem-solving. Even short breaks improve focus and prevent burnout.

When we stop, breathe, and pause, we reconnect with our inner knowing. And we all know, I’m 1000% onboard with any process which may assist achieving connecting with our inner knowing! Most of all, this isn’t about being perfect—it is about becoming present, aware, and compassionate with ourselves.

The Joy in Delight

The Delight card offers the inspired action: "Clap your hands with joy and let your inner child play. Be silly or play hooky and take the day off. This isn’t the time to buckle down and get to work; this is when you should be madcap and spontaneous. Have fun!"

Delight is not frivolous—it is fuel. Research shared in Psychology Today and on Where I’m At, shows joy and play rejuvenates us, lowers cortisol, and ripples outward to positively affect those around us. When we allow delight in, we break the cycle of overwork and procrastination by shifting our nervous system into safety and creativity.

Pausing when feeling stuck

This seems counter-intuitive! But stick with me. Stuckness often arrives wearing the masks of frustration, procrastination, indecision, or burnout. It doesn't mean we're broken. It means we're being invited to listen.

It’s not a detour either—it’s our true path. Pausing when we feel stuck or overwhelmed offers space not only for clarity, but for grace. For choosing what aligns, rather than rushing toward what is shiny and distracting.

And this is where the Delight card joins in for a bit of a boogie too. Delight is the natural companion to pause. When we stop long enough, joy tiptoes in. Delight reminds us stillness isn’t empty—it’s abundant. It’s the spark that turns silent dread into play, rest into renewal, and stuckness into surprise.

The Psychology of Pausing: Why It Works

Science has finally caught up with what intuitive wisdom has known for ages: the mind and body need intentional stillness – however this works for you.

• Micro-breaks reduce fatigue and boost creativity: Studies published in PLOS ONE show that even a five-minute pause can restore mental clarity and ignite innovation.

• Intentional rest lowers cortisol and activates your parasympathetic nervous system: Translation: moving our body from stress mode (fight-or-flight) to healing mode (rest-and-digest). We’re not just resting—we’re repairing.

• Reflection enhances performance and decision-making: The Journal of Applied Psychology notes that deliberate reflection improves learning, confidence, and long-term productivity.

• Pausing fosters resilience and emotional regulation: When we allow ourself to pause, we deepen awareness, increase adaptability, and reconnect with our core values and soul purpose.

Psychologically speaking, the pause is not passive—it’s one of the most productive acts of self-awareness we can engage in.

AuDHD Stuckness: Burnout, Procrastination & the Power of the Pause

For those of us living with AuDHD (Autism + ADHD), stuckness has layers that go deeper than just lack of motivation. It can feel like:

• Executive function fog: Knowing what to do but being unable to initiate action.

• Sensory overload: So much stimulation that our system short-circuits.

• Emotional fatigue from masking: Playing the neurotypical game leaves us running on empty.

• Fear-based procrastination: Worrying our output won’t match our vision, so avoidance takes over.

And burnout? It's not just tired. It’s an energetic collapse.

This is where the precious pause becomes radical. It’s not optional. It’s essential. Pausing allows the nervous system to recalibrate, releases the pressure to perform, and creates space for authenticity to bloom – unapologetically.

While AuDHD is still an emerging research area in Australia, there are several reviews and practice‑based studies that touch directly on burnout and the importance of pausing, pacing, and rest as prevention and recovery strategies.

In short: Australian reviews and practice‑based studies (by organisations including: Autism Alliance, Autism Awareness Australia, Neurodivergent Insights) all highlight that pausing — rest, pacing, sensory breaks — is central to preventing and recovering from AuDHD burnout. These reviews and studies:

• Reframe recovery as restorative, not performative.

• Normalise slowing down in a culture that often demands constant productivity.

• Provide ND‑affirming strategies that align with lived experience rather than imposing neurotypical standards.

In the world of AuDHD, the pause becomes a cocoon where your neuroquirky brilliance can untangle itself from societal noise and emerge, softly and unapologetically. In the pause we are reminded we’re not lazy. We’re wise. Pausing becomes our secret weapon.

Practical Soulful Pause Exercises

The most powerful pauses aren’t just breaks—they’re intentional moments of action to honour stillness as transformation.

Some ways to turn our pause into soulful practice are:

• Unplug with intention: Disconnect from noise—digital, emotional, or environmental. Five minutes offline can reset our spirit.

• Ask soul-deep questions: Use oracle card or soul writing prompts such as: ‘What do I fear about doing less with greater awareness?’ ‘What colour do I see when I pause?’

• Breathe consciously: Inhale worthiness. Exhale urgency.

• Create sensory sanctuaries: Music, nature, textures, scent. Engage your senses to soothe your nervous system.

• Use archetype anchoring: Imagine your Pause archetype— e.g. she’s cloaked in midnight blue, walking barefoot, whispering reminders of your inner stillness.

• Oracle Card pondering: Sit with the Elegant Rebel® Pause card – if she had a message about pausing specifically for you, what would it be?

  • Now, weave in the Delight card: after the pause, ask, ‘Where is delight waiting for me?’ Maybe it’s a song, a sip of tea, a shaft of sunlight. Delight is the exhale after the pause.

And I can hear form over here the cogs turning – ‘This is fab P-A but how on earth do I fit this into my day???’. And my response will always include – do not focus on the how as this leads to lack and overwhelm. No thinking is required in fact. It’s about noticing. Noticing when you are heading down the overwhelm path, like I was. And noticing the signs around you nudging to stop. Breath and invite delight in.

However. If you’re someone who prefers guidance to get started, a gentle intentional flow rather than a rigid schedule may assist. One that can flex with you and suit your energy and flow. Here’s an example:

Morning Flow — Begin with Presence

• Pause: Before checking your phone, take a five‑breath reset. Ask yourself: What colour do I see when I pause? Use this colour throughout your day to breathe and pause.

• Delight: Play one song that makes you grin. Dance, hum, or sway while making tea/coffee.

• Anchor: Whisper Denise Linn’s affirmation: I delight in everything in my world and divine joy fills me!

Midday Flow — Break the Busyness

• Pause: Step away from screens for 3 minutes. Sip a cuppa in silence.

• Delight: Do something silly—doodle, send a playful gif, or take a ‘madcap walk’ noticing odd details (shapes, colours, sounds).

• Anchor: Elegant Rebel reflection: Do I give myself the time and space to ditch the drama?

Evening Flow — Reset & Restore

• Pause: Light a candle or dim the lights. Breathe deeply, letting the day soften.

• Delight: Choose one small joy ritual—read a page of a favourite book, sketch, or watch something that makes you laugh.

• Anchor: Journal one delight from the day. Let it ripple outward by sharing it with someone or simply holding it close.

Weekly Ritual

• Pause: Gift yourself a longer unplug (an hour or half‑day). No ‘shoulds.’

• Delight: Plan one playful adventure—visit a new café, explore a park, or try something spontaneous.

This intentional, gentle flow creates a rhythm where pause interrupts overwhelm, and delight re‑energises your soul. And for us AuDHD folks, it also offers intentional mask‑free moments: pausing to drop performance, delighting to reclaim unapologetic joy.

The Elegant Rebel® Way: Pausing as Power

Elegance isn’t rushing. Rebellion isn’t noise. As Elegant Rebels® we know true empowerment begins when we stop performing and start listening.

Pausing is an unapologetic act of self-love in a society obsessed with acceleration. It’s our soul saying, 'I am worthy of ease'. It’s where wisdom whispers, where clarity finds us, and where delight and joy can tiptoe in softly.

So the next time stuckness knocks on your door—open it. Welcome it in. Make it a cuppa, put on your Pause Playlist, and breathe your way back to yourself.

And just in case you wanted to know … I peacefully achieved my writing goal that Sunday morning. It took me awhile to notice the Johnny Cash concert was still going – hours later. But after a quick pause and a deliciously, delight-filled spiced coffee, I was once again on track to discover the joy-filled delights of a Sunday afternoon by the ocean.

Peta-Ann Wood is an Indie Reader approved, international best-selling co-author and the creator of Elegant Rebel®—a movement that celebrates unapologetic self-acceptance and authenticity.

As a seasoned proofreader, published author and strategic mentor, Peta-Ann now supports writers, writers, neuroquirky women and soul-led rebels to re-ignite their voice with clarity, precision, and soulful resonance. Her editorial work is infused with soul. As a Holistic Coach, Oracle Card Author, and Complementary Therapist, she brings a unique blend of technical mastery and intuitive wisdom to every collaboration. Whether polishing a manuscript, reviewing content for impact, or mentoring clients to write with clarity, confidence and soul, Peta-Ann’s mission is clear: to assist others take up space, find their voice, and stand in their light.

As a late-diagnosed AuDHD and dyslexic soul, she loves supporting other neuroquirky – especially dyslexic – writers. She firmly believes there is a story or two within all of us—buried most of the time, but still there. Through her writing services, mentoring and rebellious grace, she invites others to reclaim their truth and share their uniqueness with the world.